Death, Failure, Success – what’s non-negotiable?

Unexpected death of a young, bright and talented lady, here in India. A Chartered Accountant, which is one of the toughest exams to crack.

She recently joined in one of the biggest consultancy firms in the world, generally called as a part of Big 4.

Reason cited for death as toxic work culture, 18 hours a day, no weekends and always under pressure to complete some or other thing.

There is much uproar going on because of this on various social media and her devastated parents even put a letter to the CEO of the company.

So, this write-up is not totally about the above unfortunate thing. It was much more serious than above.

At home, I was discussing this with my wife, my son – 12 years old was also there at that time.

Wife, when heard it from me suggested, she should have left the job then and there, life comes first and there was no such necessary for that lady as her family is well-off.

Meanwhile my kid sitting there, when heard that the lady should have quit, jumped in the discussion and said, how could she leave the work? What would people have talked about her then, everyone should have called her a loser.

Then I just patted his head saying, son, there is absolutely nothing precious than life.

But his remarks, made me worried to the core. At this age when he worries more about things like ‘what people will say’ and ‘failure not an option’ made me think whole night.

What is it that made him think so? What is happening around him which made him think failure is bigger than life?

Does he see me or my wife going through some compromises and still keep mum, or something happening at his school making him think so.

Every person, especially an employee has to endure at the work place, not always and not everything will be good all the time.

And in some cases it goes even further and end up like that lady.

“Is it the competitions at the school, the upbringing in the era of social media, the instant gratification and I got so many likes in an hour comparison”, making them think like that.

In a typical middle class family, the expectations from the kids is like, they should study well, behave properly, get good grades, secure admissions in good colleges and everything just to get a good job finally.

This job thing is so much emphasized in the minds, they see their parents – their uplift or downfall through the success in jobs.

Somehow they also feel getting a job and keeping it is one of the most important things in life.

Father/mother come home exhausted and sometimes frustrated, but still go to the work on second day as if there is no option.

Kids understood that if job is not there, there will be nothing to help continue the life.

Why he said so, I haven’t tried to check with him, as it will be too much for him.

What needs to be changed and can anything be changed? I have no answer to it.