My kid came crying that his teacher didn’t consider the many steps he put properly in a math problem and gave zero for the wrong answer because of a silly typo.
It took me to my childhood, where I too expected a ‘mercy cum donation’ of few marks for the steps I put in.
I tried consoling my child saying in Maths, the correct answer is a must and just doing proper steps won’t qualify for the full marks.
“What about the efforts I put in then”, he sulked. I had no answer and I just tried to neglect.
Ratings, marks, appraisals, and everything depend on the pre-decided action standards. The set benchmarks – if met, one can be applicable for respective benefits, if not, nothing gets rewarded – neither your efforts nor your intentions.
In jobs, at the start of the year, the KPIs [Key performance indicators] are decided for individuals, and the team and in the coming year we need to perform to meet those.
A lot of hard work goes in, sleepless nights, sacrificing family time, and sometimes health too, we put in everything, and in the last month, something unforeseen happens and everything goes for a toss.
When we sit for the appraisals, the achievements against the KPIs are what gets seen and therefore no appraisal.
Now we will see the other side of it.
In this digital world, from ordering the daily needs to booking a cab anything is possible at the click of a button. But here as well, the ratings and rankings are a must.
Everyone and everything gets rated/ranked – five stars, no stars, poor, excellent.
You are booking a cab. The general expectation is that the cab should come on time, it needs to be in good condition, cleanliness needs to be maintained, no delays in reaching the destination, driver’s behaviour and no extra charges to be asked for.
In mind, we decide whether to give excellent or poor, based on all the above parameters.
The cab comes late, we start getting agitated. The AC doesn’t work adding up to the existing frustration of getting late. The smell of oil and the seats untidy.
We set the KPIs for this drive and nothing is up to the mark. “Poor rating, no stars”, yes, we are done with this.
But, during the journey, the driver apologises for being late. He confesses, that his vehicle had an issue and somehow he borrowed this one from someone and tried to reach on time, but traffic caused the delay.
Then he takes a shortcut to reach within time. At the end of the ride, he again apologised for the delay, and unclean car and discounted some amount from the fare to compensate for all these.
You see his honesty and give him his due fare. Then when it comes to ranking, your mind gets biased whether to consider his situation which was real, the delay was not intentional or strictly check on all the parameters you had in your mind before riding the cab.
However, getting empathetic and behaving accordingly may not always be good.
In my kid’s case, if the teacher considered his efforts and gave him half marks for that problem, that may set a precedent that it’s okay to be incorrect.
In the driver’s case, despite all the issues, if I rate him excellent, then it may set a precedent that it’s okay with whatever vehicle he comes with and apologising thereafter.
In life, seldom it happens that we get rewarded for our efforts, it’s the achievement against the set benchmarks, which gets counted.
When there is a lot at stake and missing on single thing causes a huge loss – loss in wealth, image, or anything then being empathetic won’t be advisable.
The people, the corporations, and the countries are known for their image, and how up-to-date they are in their managing operations, care for customers, and known for strict rules and regulations.
I think, keeping the pre-decided rules in mind and making it a compulsion to abide by them is necessary to make something as a benchmark.
But in my case, I would have given a zero to my kid, but a full five to the driver. I think being kind to the efforts put in at the old stage is okay rather than setting a bad precedent at an early age.
Emotionsbyvijay.com 
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